Pretending
by WindlessHarmony
Summary: November 11 and Hei share a secret. Contractors cannot feel. But the world has a habit of breaking the rules. Yaoi, NovemberXHei, BoyXBoy


**This is definitely one of the best fanfictions I have ever written, so I hope you all enjoy. May turn into a chapter story, depending on the fandom. But otherwise, enjoy the yaoi, you little pervrts you! ^^ -Canta**

They stared at each other through the feathers of night, the breeze ruffling their already torn clothes. To the people that prowled the dark streets below, they were forgotten, enveloped in the night that permeated the area. The dark one stood lopsided on the edge of the building, the false sky pressed against his back as if it was the only thing supporting him. A white mask etched with purple covered his face, the mouth set in an unreadable expression that could easily be mistaken for a frown.

Shards of ice sparkled along his sides, his black cloak torn nearly off. The light one leaned against the shed, panting heavily as his breath created crystals in frigid air. Not that it bothered him; he was the epitome of ice and all things snow, after all. His suit was torn, crimson staining whatever parts were left, water dripping from his disheveled hair.

Their eyes met, glinting blue orbs and swept black plains covered by white.

"Here we are again, mate," the light one said, attempting to appear fierce in his state of disarray. The dark one swayed where he stood, as if speaking was too much of a feet to perform. "I guess so, Ember-chan." At the sound of the distainful nickname, the one referred to as 'Ember-chan' frowned. Just a slight curving down of the lips, but the dark one caught it all the same.

"Don't call me that, Hei. I at least show respect for your name, so show the same for mine." The crystalline voice broke through the silence that seemed as thick as water. The two of them watched one another yet again, Ember sliding to his knees as some twinge of hidden pain racked his body. But he stood back up quickly, having no intentions of showing weakness to the dark one, no, _Hei_, in front of him.

It had been awhile since they had last seen each other. Their last encounter had ended in a flurry of ice and a crackling whip of lightning. That had been two days ago. And now, as they began to power down and lose their adrenaline from the fight that had taken place mere seconds before, they began to finally wonder why they went through their endless cycle.

_Ember-chan, no, November,_ Hei reminded himself. _The man was strong, stoic, and a great leader. And I loved him for it once, back when we had met for the first time. When did that all change?_

The two of them had fallen into their routine; make love, depart, fight, start over.

As they squared their shoulders and faced each other again, November took a step forwards. Hei didn't move; he couldn't, his heels already hovering over the edge. "There was a time when you called me your lover. What happened to Li? Did Hei kill him?" Nothing stirred; even the wind fell silent as the harsh words were uttered, dissolving as mist before vanishing into a place where no one would ever see them again.

"Li only exists during the day. I am the Black Reaper during the darkness. You of all should know that best." November inched forward again, the shaking as Hei forced himself to stay upright evening into his plain of vision. "Why don't you come with me? My payment is getting a bit overdue at the moment."

Hei forced himself to take a step forward, and even though it was hidden by white, an expression of pain and mixed sadness painted its way across his cheeks. The dark one and the light one paused, both judging how long the other would be able to endure his state of anguish. Evidently, the Black Reaper was not up for the pain tonight, and was at a disadvantage to November in every way that he chose to look at it.

Hei was burdened by human emotions, since he used to be one. And the sadness permeating his mind was added to by the physical pain that his body and his heart were experiencing. Rather than fight a losing battle, he simply surrendered, falling into darkness.

November watched in horror as Hei fell backwards, his back letting out a sickening crack as it hit the side of the building. The Reaper seemed to teeter, as if Earth was deciding on letting the light have him or allowing gravity to pull him down into his grave. He wanted the first one to happen and instantly slipped forwards, using the water pooled along the building to create a barrier that held the other in place.

After that, his subconscious mind vaguely registered walking through the streets of the midnight city, his world narrowed down to two things; the man sprawled against his back and his feet. _Step, step, step. Slip, slip, slip. _His hand curled against the door knob and he drew it open, dropping Hei onto the bed before collapsing there himself. His mind slipped into uneasy sleep.

The next time he awoke was sometime during the day; sunlight streamed in through the window at his side. November couldn't remember why he felt the way he did and when he attempted to sit up, his sheets were stained with blood. He wasn't sure why he felt at ease with it; something about a fragment of memory deterred him from caring about the reasons why the blood was there. But as his mind began to focus, it narrowed to the simple realization that Hei was no longer beside him. The other was gone.

His hand unconsciously felt for the space where he had collapsed, the cold sheets making him fully realize his mistake; no fool would be stupid enough to believe that the Black Reaper would become docile enough to _stay put when injured._ November was the one who knew this best.

But even as he shifted and drew himself to a shaky stance, he couldn't avoid the clenching hole in his chest. The pain was like a splinter, something that needed to be constantly picked at before it could be removed. November had tried so many times and he had failed so many more. His wavering legs allowed him to stumble into the kitchen, arms supporting him against the sink as he switched the water on.

Pink ran down the drain as he cleansed his hands, splashing a bit of the biting liquid onto his face. Now that he thought about it, he had completely missed his payment. Or had he? Something in his hazy mind registered a brief waking period throughout the night, smoke curling into the heated air. _Hei._ The man pulled away from him and then he slipped back into a steady sleep.

"Dammit, turn off the water!" The voice startled him and the water was off before he could barely register what was happening. _Hei . . . is still here?_ November felt his legs twitch again and he allowed himself to sink to the floor, arms flattened against the cupboards with his forehead resting against the cool wood. Something didn't feel real; this wasn't how it was supposed to be, with Hei in his shower and November weak against his own will.

His throat ached as he breathed, heart pounding as he attempted to get everything under control. But hands suddenly fell onto his shoulders, November freezing as lips brushed against his ears as steely drops fell onto his exposed shoulder. "I could kill you right now if I wanted. You know that, right?"

His reply, when it came, was soft and feathery, the rasp of a leaf against the water. "Of course. But you won't." Those fingers flexed against his skin, as if contemplating how to deal with him. ". . . How can you be so sure?" November let out a deep sigh, slumping back against the man providing him with support. "Because if you truly wanted to kill me, Hei, then you would've done it when you paid my payment last night."

Silence.

Stillness.

Seduction.

Waiting.

And now it was Hei's turn to be the carrier; November didn't complain when his sore body was pulled into those gentle arms, footsteps echoing through his vacant house. The black one rested the light one against the bed softly, sitting next to him. Hei rested his elbows against his knees, staring out the window. "That's true, Ember-chan."

November felt the pain well up inside of him, his growl resonating lowly throughout the room. "I told you, don't call me that! Only he was allowed to . . ." He let his voice go quiet, tears clouding his already fogged vision as he watched the white ceiling. It was unusual for a Contractor to cry. But he was unusual, so he let the moment of weakness overtake him.

The first ones slid down as a head suddenly rested against his chest.

"I am still Li, Jack. We are both pretending. In darkness I am Hei. In darkness you are November. We are more alike than you'll ever know." For a while, they brooded in silence, their breathing falling into a well-timed song. He wanted to sleep but his racing mind wouldn't let him; Hei shifted again, lying on top of him as he crossed his arms against his chest.

The next time he spoke, it was muffled against cloth. ". . . The same goes for you. I'm dripping with water and yet you refuse to even lift your hand against me, even while I'm lying atop you." November allowed impulse to guide his hand to Hei's hair, stroking the damp softness beneath his fingers. It broke the thin line that neither of them knew was drawn; Hei slid off of him slowly, lying between his legs to fondle November gently.

The light one knew better than to moan; no, a ticklish, almost child-like move wasn't at all arousing. But that didn't bother Hei in the slightest; he simply slipped the others pants off, followed by his boxers, and wiggled his hand up the other's shirt.

November had to admit, he was impressed with fluidity in which Hei moved, so graceful and light in his movements. He didn't blush as the other looked him over; he was careless enough to admit that he was beautiful. The dark one nuzzled his cheek against November's thigh, the other reveling in the silk dancing against him.

Gentle breath ghosted along his cock, November feeling the faint stirrings of arousal begin to shoot themselves into his blood. Hei ran his fingers along the shaft, still rubbing against the other. "You're still good at torture, you know." November let himself grin, the empty expression stretching along his flawless skin. "It's what I do best."

The light one figured how this session was going to go. Hei always ran through different sets of motions for each way that he planned to be taken. So November's itching feeling was quelled when Hei licked the head, his arm coming up to drape along his hips. They had only done this particular form of torture once before, and November had to admit that it had been his favourite.

But before Hei could continue, he reached down and moved his head away. The dark one lifted his head, their eyes meeting. There was a time when November would not have paused, not even for a second, when Hei was involved. All of that changed when Hei- or was it Li? He didn't know- decided to take the little Contractor from before. He still remembered that conversation.

_You went for another man._ I wanted to see what I'd be like. _What?_ I'm always the uke, and you're always the seme. I wanted to see what it would be like the other way. _But you went after a child, another Contractor. All you had to do was ask._ But you would've said no. _I still would have listened to your request. You didn't need to go to another Contractor. He was just a child. _Hei had grown distraught, his eyes glittering as he stared out the window. And then you killed him.

November had to admit that even something like that was cruel, even for himself. He still didn't know if Hei had held feelings for the other Contractor, but he wasn't about to write it off as a simple sexual encounter. November didn't doubt that there had been passion involved but he wasn't one to care; Hei _was_ in his arms after all, metaphorically speaking.

He was tempted to push Hei away and tell him that it wasn't right, not after the pain they had both been forced to endure. But he couldn't and the gentle nudge to his arm was all it took to make it fall back onto the sheets. "Don't think too much. Let me do my job."

Silently, November cursed Hei's inability to read emotions. But he was also grateful; who wouldn't want the Black Reaper between their legs? The light one had to admit, he had tamed the darkness inside of the beast currently nuzzling him. Hei had gone from an untouchable tiger to a purring kitten.

Instead of licking, Hei slipped November's cock into his mouth, wrapping his tongue around the tip. His hand followed, stroking the base as he applied a gentle suction. The light one propped himself on his elbows, watching the slow bobbing of the head between his quivering thighs. Hei quickened his pace by degrees, dancing his tongue around the flesh in his mouth.

Their eyes locked, a lustful challenge being conveyed between the melting ice and burning mercury. Hei let the now fully erect November free from his mouth, moving off of the bed to pull off his pants and drop them into a puddle of fabric onto the floor. His boxer's followed, the light one relishing in the strip tease session he was being present with. And then the other tugged of his shirt, letting it flutter to the ground.

November had to admit, that flawless expanse of skin was enticing. He beckoned with his hand for Hei to come forward and yanked him onto his lap, pulling him into their first kiss of the night as his hands travelled vigorously over the ivory.

November knew what to do; Hei was inexperienced with kissing but that was alright, since he made up for every other flaw with his vocal abilities. The dark one drew back, slithering back down the other's body so his lips were pressed against the head of November's member.

Instead of taking in just the tip, he slid his mouth down and around as much of the heated flesh as he could, coating it in saliva. Hei continued this for a short time before he pulled back, licking his lips as his lust-glazed eyes met November's.

At once, Hei heaved himself up and over the erect cock before him, supporting his weight against his knees. November watched with heated eyes as he drew his cheeks apart, revealing his unprepared entrance. The dark one lined himself up with the light one before pressing down just enough, just avoiding penetration. November's jaw clenched and he went to force Hei down but the tip of him popped into the other's entrance right after his thoughts.

The other did not move after that and instead leaned forward, tugging on the shirt still on November's chest. He hastily drew it off, tossing it to the floor before reaching for Hei's hips. He stopped him yet again, pinning him by the wrists to the bed.

"Torture, remember?" Hei asked quietly, breathing trying to calm as he began to slide the rest of the way down. November watched a contorted expression of pain flicker across that face, the hands gripping his moving away to rest against the light one's stomach. Those thighs quivered as he finally let his weight settle onto the other.

November sat up, gripping Hei by the arms to lift him as he pulled himself into a kneeling position. The Reaper's breath hitched at the sudden change of the angle inside of him, letting his head fall against November's shoulder. The light one wrapped his arms around Hei's back, supporting him as he pulled out and thrusted back in. The gentle in-out caused Hei to moan softly, purring almost.

November did it again, being rewarded with a purring whine. He had always been the one with a gentle, sensual edge to their lovemaking. This time, Hei raised himself up, slamming back down with a much harder force. The light one growled in warning, angry that Hei didn't want to wait. But he was getting stretched to his limits as well and settled for pressing Hei back against the mattress.

He drew out and rammed back inside, Hei howling his encouragement. November continued his ruthless fucking, eliciting howl after moan after whimper from the man at his mercy. Sweat dripped from his face as he curled his fingers around the neglected arousal below him, Hei whimpering desperately for release. November was the one who gave it to him.

_That's right, Hei. You cannot pretend to hate me and you can't go to any other. I am the only one who can give you this pleasure, this release from the world and pain you've been forced to endure. That Contractor . . . you can't pretend that he offered anything other than what I'm giving you now._

The dark one's back arched at a nearly impossible angle, white splashing against his and November's stomachs and the hand still pumping him. The light one continued to pivot his hips, growing closer to the climax that he wanted so badly, more than anything else he had ever wanted before. Several more thrusts and he rammed into the other as hard as he could, gripping Hei's shoulders as tremors shivered through him almost violently.

Finally exhausted, November collapsed onto Hei, drawing out of the warmth to roll onto his side. Maybe they could pull out of their cycle. Hei could still be Li and November could still be Jack. He could be Ember-chan and the other could love him. Hei could be Hei and November could find a way to forgive him for destroying Li.

But pretending was what they did best. In the morning, November would be Jack and Hei would be Li.

**What did you think? Review and let me know! :D And many hugs to ANimEisAweSOmE440! You have given me so much inspiration and much needed encouragement! If you ever need a favour, just ask! :D If you all want someone to thank for your NovemberXHei action, thank my awesome friend from above. **


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